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Rules #3c: Living a Karma-Free Life: Strategies for Human Relationships

This Way to the Great Egress

While you are on the Earth plane, you are living in the worlds of reincarnation and karma. You come back again and again - strapped to the proverbial "Wheel of 84" - the wheel of births and deaths.

The wheels continue to spin - around and around - until you have learned all that life has to teach you. Yet, you can step out...

You can live a life as free of karma as possible by following this "simple rule":

"Be civil to all; sociable to many; familiar with few; friend to one; enemy to none." (Benjamin Franklin)

Being Civil

Want to live a karma free life? Then follow Franklin's Rule above: start by being civil.

Here is how to be civil to all.

* Civil: Being civil (polite, kind, calm) to all is the hardest part of "Franklin's Rule" to follow because it applies to ALL people ALL of the time. It has taken me a long time to learn how to be civil... I must admit that I still fall short of this valuable goal at times. Yet I do understand how being "civil to all" is what creates great karma.

* What Goes Around Comes Around: I have seen the smallest acts of kindness that I have cast upon the waters come back to me. When you take the time to be civil to others - especially when it costs you but benefits you not at all - it makes an impression on the universe (and often on the person themself). This creates good karma in the ethers which will eventually manifest into your physical reality.

* Civility Equals Control: It was easier to be civil to all once I realized that being civil meant I was in control. When you are civil, you are in control of yourself, you have a better chance of being in control of the situation that you are in, and, at least, you will not be why the situation gets out of control. Notice that when you are uncivil, you stop being part of the solution and you start being part of the problem.

* Incivility Landscape: When you are civil to all, you are cultivating a positive energetic landscape that will attract the right people, resources, and opportunities. The true damage of being uncivil is that people, resources, and opportunities will dry up all around you - slowly but surely. At some point, the uncivil will wonder why things do not happen as easily for them... as they do for others.

* Do What You Can: Learning to be civil to others is a skill that takes time and patience to master. You will fall short of this goal at first. Just focus on doing what you can to be civil to everyone at all times... be very compassionate with yourself when you fail to do so... and commit to doing better next time. You will get it right when you make it a habit... This habit is one that can-will transform your karma for the better and your life will improve as a result of your loving kindness.

Be Sociable

Want to live a karma free life? Then follow Franklin's Rule above: make sure to be sociable.

Here is how to be sociable with many.

* Sociable: Being sociable (congenial, helpful, and amiable) to many... is what most people do with ease. If you think about it, it is manners (how to act in a civil manner), ethics (standards of proper conduct), and morals (what is right and wrong) that influence people more than laws (statutes created by governments) do.

* Manners, Ethics, Morals: Being sociable means displaying good manners, acting in ethical ways, and letting morals guide your conduct. This conduct puts others at ease with you. It influences them into thinking that you are congenial, helpful, and amiable. It helps them to feel that you are approachable and it invites them to get to know you better. It motivates others to introduce you around.

* Display Empathy: "Empathy and fellow feeling form the very basis of morality. The capacities for empathy, for feeling responsibility toward others and for reaching out to help them can be stunted. It becomes too easy to turn our backs on fellow human beings... to have 'compassion fatigue.' (Sissela Bok, "Mayhem")." Having empathy means feeling and acting from compassion, especially when it is difficult.

* Selective Sociability: The few who try to be sociable to everyone find out that sociability, by its nature, is selective. It is not possible to greet every person you see, to strike up conversations with them, or to get to know them past a certain point. We can be sociable only to those with whom we have regular dealings, like family members, friends, and coworkers. When we make the effort to be sociable, it makes our lives so much easier because it makes our interactions more pleasant.

* Fosters Trust: The most important result of being sociable is that it fosters trust. Sociability helps you to feel more self confident and to project to others that you are indeed a trustworthy person. Sociability helps others to feel more comfortable with you because you are a mannerly, ethical, and moral person and therefore trustworthy. When others trust you, it is because you fostered that trust by being sociable to all those of your acquaintance whether family, friends, or coworkers.

Familiar Few

Want to live a karma free life? Then follow Franklin's Rule above: only be familiar with few.

Here is how to be familiar with few.

* Familiar: Being familiar (confiding, open, frank) with few... is what most people do in real life. Although some routinely tell their life story to anyone who will listen, most do not share personal details with everyone. In fact, most people only share their intimate details with their small circle of trusted and trustworthy friends.

* The Few, the Trustworthy: Even the most sociable individual, who has many acquaintances, is likely to only be familiar with a few. For the vast majority of people, these few are family members that they have known for a very long time. Their long experience together either pulls them closer -or- tears them apart. For those who are close, being familiar only draws them closer over the years.

* The Few, the Frequent: The familiar few do not have to be family members. The few are those who are in our life, usually on a daily or weekly basis. Believe it or not, we have much more to talk about with those that we contact regularly than with those we have not heard from in awhile. Absence does not make the heart grow fonder. It is frequent contact that creates closeness and establishes familiarity.

* "Soft Place to Fall": The familiar few serve to be our "soft place to fall". We can truly be ourselves among our familiar few. With them, we have nothing to prove, we can "let our hair down" and we can feel free to open our heart and mind. We can bounce ideas off them. We can ask for constructive criticism and know they will treat us with compassion. We feel certain that they are safe people for us.

* Best Interests at Heart: The familiar few have earned our trust by their long track record of kindness. We know and feel that they have our best interests at heart. We know that the few will be there for us tomorrow, next week, next month, next year, and for the rest of our lives. We can call on the familiar few at any hour of the day or night... and they will be there for us when we need them.

True Friends

Want to live a karma free life? Then follow Franklin's Rule above: only one best friend.

Here is how to keep true friends in your life.

* Friends: It is easy to be friendly with those we like and with those who like us. This is what friendship is all about. For those of us who have drawn "bad" karmic partners in their family, attracting friends outside the family by being sociable is a must. For everyone, having one true, best friend is an absolute lifeline.

* Only One? Here is where I disagree with Franklin... it is possible to have more than one best friend. I have been privileged to have had two lifelong best friends. I could not choose between them and they are tied for Number One in my heart. I have known others with multiple best friends but I have not found someone yet who has double digits of best friends. For when you have found a best friend, you have found a precious treasure that is rare in any given lifetime.

* Being Friendly: To have a friend just be a friend. Want the best for your friend just like you want the best for yourself. The more you and your friend are alike, the more you share common interests, the more you are equal in talents, skills, and abilities, the easier it will be to form lasting friendships. Best friends require a big investment of time, energy, effort, and understanding that each makes in the other.

* Commonality: The best friends are those which have something in common. Perhaps this is a childhood spent together, a close family relationship, a shared interest, and so on. Friendship only works when there is a commonality which creates equality between the friends. The greatest commonality between friends is a mutual liking based in long experience with one another... through many past lives.

* No Matter What: What separates best friends from regular friends is that you can call on a best friend at 3 in the morning... and instead of them being angry with you... they are concerned for your welfare. Best friends are there for one another no matter what... they do not give up on one another. Best friends are those who have been there for you in the past, are there for you now, and will be there for you in the future... no matter what. They are someone you can truly rely on!

No Enemies

Want to live a karma free life? Then follow Franklin's Rule above: absolutely no enemies!

Here is how to avoid making enemies at all costs.

* Enemies: If you have people in your life who do not like you - as long as they do not consider you an enemy - you are doing well. Enemies are those who hate one another with the intensity of 1,000 suns. The problem with having enemies is it creates bad karma... the problem with being an enemy is it wastes life energy.

* Energy of Hatred: Indulging in hatred is as stupid as you taking poison and expecting someone else to die. Hatred chews up your physical body (it can shred up your heart), it disrupts your mind (while one is hating they will do things they would never consider doing normally), and it stirs up your emotions (while one is hating they are capable of crimes of passion). Those who hate consistently only succeed in drastically reducing the number of days in their life.

* Do None Harm: When you harm people, you create enemies. When you commit to doing no harm, you are also automatically cutting down on enemies. No one starts out wanting to have or to be an enemy. When confrontations ensue, bitter feelings and bitter enemies are the usual result. So always do your best to leave others with good feelings about you: be sure to leave friends not enemies.

* Do Not Rollover: Leaving friends behind you does not mean you should let others roll over you. When people try to cheat you, stand up for your rights. When people lie to you, call them on it. When people try to hurt those you love, fight back. When people are breaking the law, report them. If you stand up for yourself in a loving manner, others may not like it... but they will not consider you an enemy.

* Diffuse Negative Energy: If you are feeling in disharmony with another, it is because there are negative energy bridges between you. You can diffuse this negative energy - without having to speak or interact with them - by doing the Loving Kindness exercise. When you can sincerely wish all others well - regardless of your experience with them - you will have no enemies! That is a good thing!

Credits: from channeled information.



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